Another traffic jam, another chat with the cabbie. I should make a series out of this. They said in a movie somewhere that cab drivers are good judge of characters, second only to bartender. They’ve probably met thousands of different people behind their wheel. Anyway, luckily this time the driver only had a bearable mild body odor. Wouldn’t it be even more miserable trapped in the traffic jam with a stench that would make you nauseating all the way?
The bloke is a proud 37 years old with a rather abrasive manner. Some motorcycle run passes him in a way he didn’t approve of, and suddenly some animal and bodily expletive blurted out like machine gun. Interesting character this chap. He admitted that he’s pretty naughty when he was a boy, raised by a strictly discipline policeman father. With his thick Batak accent, he told me about how he used to run away from home, and stop short of saying that his father abused him as a child with plenty of physical punishment for his misdemeanor. It goes to show that rigid discipline and severe grueling act won’t always brings the good out of someone.
He’s now a father of two and trying so hard to straightened his behavior. Even though it’s hard when it comes down to women, he admitted. Especially living in five days away from home each week, a man needed some sort of lechery or ‘channeling’ he flagrantly said. I wanted to ask whether the fact that his father often beat him as a child, would he then pass it onto his sons or did it make some sort of repercussions in his behavioral pattern in the long run. But I didn’t want to offend him with such a sensitive question. He said that once out of fury, his father put him in the district prison after wrecking his car. I was simply astonished when I hear that.
Talking with the man made me think about the last episode of Oprah. The main theme was crime and violence. I remember one respondent remarked about the defining moments in our life. How we respond to that situation will dictate the course of our life. In these case she chose the wrong action and facing a life sentence as the result. Oprah also share the story about her defining moment was when her mother grew so tired of her antics and trying to ‘leave’ her in a county prison. Luckily the prison was full and Oprah realized that if she didn’t change her manners she would really end up behind bars. She can’t imagine what would have happened if the prison were not full at the time, what with all the rape, rage, and violence fostered in the US penal system. She is now one of the richest entertainers in the world though.
Speaking of defining moments in our life made my mind wander to several flashbacks. Surely you have some on your mind too. Mine would be when I suddenly decided to quit the Akabri (Indonesian Military Akademi) and went to the University instead. My father was speechless for more than one minute when I told him about it by phone. I still maintain that I made the right decision, yet sometimes I do wonder, what would it be like if I am still there. Several friends (who still in the armed forces) applaud my decision though, because apparently life as an army man is dreadfully arduous both physique and economy. However, there’s a solemn proud ness and dignity in serving your country as a soldier. Even though in recent days, our society look upon them with mixed feelings, some are admittedly demeaning, yet they are still regarded highly in my book.
It’s not all about big decisions and defining moments, though. You might remember in Vanilla Sky, how little things in life can be a certain turning point for us. I found myself very intrigued by the strange look in Tom Cruise’s face when he weighs his decision whether to join Cameron Diaz’s car or not. Seems very simple. Which cab to take? Which turn to make? Which way to go? All small choices can lead to a probable big occurrence for us. I never thought that helping a girl with her assignment in the end lead her to become my wife. Or some random project I did in college will end up getting me hired for the first time and made me wind up working in the field I do now. We’ll never know which one, and that’s where lies all the excitement.
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